March 4, 2005
Wanting Dead or Alive
Life and death continue to literally hang in the balance. On the
7th at 11:15 am EST, Mars in Capricorn exactly opposes Saturn
retrograde in Cancer. This is deeply intense. Everything about
incarnating and disincarnating is up. Jupiter retrograde in Libra
is T-crossing to that polarization. All the effort to find the
middle way, the balance, the loving, just, proper thing..........
that's all up too. It'll drive you crazy. The corker is Mercury
entering Aries on the 4th at 8:34 pm EST. This kicks in a Grand
Cross by Sign that will last until the Spring Equinox. It is a
fuzzy Grand Cross in which things don't quite come into focus
without the satisfication of knowing what you are doing, what is
going on. Let that be!!! What an opportunity to burn off
considerable aspects of the physical mind. You are cooking in the
stew of what brought you to embodiment. That's a load and a half.
Unload, if you please!
The point is that it is all pointless on the Wheel. The Path is a
rut and it goes in a circle. Ascension is a spiral stairway to
heaven that is nevertheless most obviously a circle with a twist.
Get all the DNA strands you want but your pantings are still in a
twist. Whatever goes up must inherently come down no matter what
the dogma, faiths and beliefs suggest. Most importantly all of
this is not who you are. Who you are is not determined by your
grinding in a certain direction on the Wheel. Getting it right
only keeps you wronged. Getting it high and mighty leaves you
endlessly mighty high and dry while thirsting for more of the
same, the same that is always dressed up to be the new and
improved. The futility of the Game drives the quest, the hope,
the meaning/purpose of it all. Are you tired yet? Wake up to your
inner gerbil, your higher lemming, your sacred kowtow.
It ain't no big deal but don't tell that to the Wheel. Grind you
must in the name of the Load and Saver. Hollow lulu. Praise Good!
Turn the other cheek and get a kick out of it. Do you see? Do you
feel? Do you smell the rancid Dream. Drop the Game and you will
no longer despair in hope; you will no longer lonely in the all
one, you will no longer seek who you already are. Give up seeking
and you give up hiding. Amazing Grace is a con for the pros. The
middle way leads you in the path of the semis. The holey grail
leaks; who cares if it is half empty or half full?
The effort of the Dream has never been more obvious. You have not
seen nuttin' yet! The more you seek for fulfillment on high,
within, one for all and all for one........ the more you will
fracture out chasing after your evermore evident projections.
Chasing your tail in the cosmic quest will become more fragrant.
You will bite your other hand you thought had freed you. You will
climb high into a pit. These are not curses. I simply point to
what has always been the trappings of the Dream, the mind, the
Game. Drop it or be dropped on your head in the name of
enlightenment.
The 10th brings a New Moon in Pisces at 4:10 am EST. That is
oxymoronic. This newness in the endness doesn't exactly feel like
renewal. It is veryyyyyy easy to dissasociate, to seek the high,
to seek the other side of the veil of green pasteurization. Envy
is a juicy projection indeed. Though shall covet in the Dream and
every effort to stop will keep you more and more embedded. You
can claim your own consciousness and clear your own karma; you
can clear your identification in the projection system of the
Dream. If you awaken in the Dream you are still in the Dream.
Awakening is the usual ploy of the higher mind. Lucidity in the
muck is a silly seduction at its core but ohhhh is it popular.
All that happens is that you go into a new, blasted, blessed
state. Bliss is ignorance. The Light is at the end of the tunnel
because you continue to tunnel into the Dream. Go to the Light
all you want but you'll be kept in the dark while coming and
going. One more time......... are you tired yet? This week will
be a keen illustration of the Dream in fractions. Give up
multiplying the divisions. Subtracting yourself will never add up
to the sum of it all. You don't have to be squarely rooted in the
sacred geometry. Numbering your daze on the Wheel will count you
out and have you counting on the mind. This hyper state of math
amphetamine is not you. Claim your own consciousness and clear
the department of silly walks department or forever hold your
pieces.
A whole lotta shakin' goin' on,
Mark